I’ve been working in the local church setting for five years now. There have been things that I have learned and observed over those years that have hurt me. Marriages are one of them. I don’t understand (I have some ideas) why we seem to suck so bad at marriages. I’m gonna simply rant… no solutions… no advice.
If we are followers of Christ, and we are supposed to be like him, act like him, talk like him, feel like him, love like him, then why do we suck so bad at marriages.
We are called to be servants and yet when we step through that door of our house (at least it seems to me) we take off the servant hat and put on the “I’m here to be served hat.”
What is the deal… why can’t we seem to get our marriages straight… well I know they aren’t straight… here’s what my marriage and life feels and looks like sometimes… but why can’t we seem to survive it?
And anyway why should we just survive through marriage? I’m not looking for a marriage that is just a boring straight line. I wouldn’t trade what our life together has involved for anything. And I’m pretty sure God doesn’t want us to survive, I don’t want to just survive. Jesus says, “I came so that everyone would have life, and have it in its fullest.” Well I’m pretty sure that he was including marriages in that and I can think of a pretty stink’n good marriage. And I’m not just talking about the sex.
Maybe it is the first part of that verse… (maybe some insight, but still no solutions) where it talks about the thief and how he wants to steal, kill, and destroy us. Steal away our joy, kill our love, destroy our intimacy.
I want to see a change, and difference in the lives of Christian marriages. What a draw it would be if we could stand proud and say having Christ in our lives makes a difference in all our relationships including our marriages. To see a bunch of thriving marriages would be great wouldn’t it. Less stories of nasty breakups that divide people and hurt families, friends, and churches.
Anne and I are going through a series by Jim Burns called, “Creating an Intimate Marriage.” My hope first off of course is that our marriage would be improved as we intentially invest in it… but secondly I’m hoping this is something that we can offer to couples in our area. I would love for our church, our neighborhood, our community to have better marriages. I’d love to be a part of that.